Introduction

The thought of being in a relationship is a very deep and great motivator. When I get a crush, the strongest motivating factor is impressing them to the point that I succeed.

But that’s not the right reason to have a relationship. It goes deeper than that. I want mutual, and unconditional love and support. I love being intimate with someone, and hearing them share their problems. I also want mutual partnership in material and social affairs. A point of stability should be found between each other.

I don’t believe in the “perfect one”. I don’t believe love is found by how easy it is to talk to someone, or how attractive they are. I’ve had great discussions with friends, who were ultimately incompatible with me, and fundamentally lost.

Love comes through initimacy, proximity. Not so much the ease of discussion, as much as the comfort of discussion. You can get used to someone and develop language with them if you talk with them enough, killing awkward discussion as you get used to them.

Physical attraction is unfortunately involved in love, no matter how much I want to deny it. I’m lucky because my face isn’t bad. I may struggle with my body, but I believe with care it’ll turn out much better than I’d expect.

I’m also lucky in that it’s not a pervasive bias in me. Physical attraction becomes less important with proximity and intimacy. Someone who you weren’t attracted to in the beginning, can become attractive to you eventually.